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Never Have Your Dog Stuffed Signed Copy by Alan Alda (2006-06-03)

Never Have Your Dog Stuffed: And Other Things I've Learned

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Never Have Your Dog Stuffed Signed Copy by Alan Alda (2006-06-03)

Never Have Your Dog Stuffed: And Other Things I've Learned

4.85 63,653 ratings · 9,684 reviews
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Overview: Alan Alda's autobiography travels a path less taken. Instead of a sensationalist, name-dropping page-turner, Alda writes about his life as a memory play, an exercise in recollecting his childhood, his parents (dad Robert was a veteran on stage, film, and vaudeville), and his career. You want to know about Alda's most famous work, the eleven years on M*A*S*H? You have exactly 16 pages to do so, and guess what: It's one of the least entertaining parts of the book. But should fans of the award-winning actor-writer-director avoid this slim memoir? Not in the slightest. Slyly humorous and open-hearted, Never Have Your Dog Stuffed is a breezy, most enjoyable read. Alda's ability to recall his childhood (including backstage at raunchy vaudeville shows), school years, stage struggles and successes is as entertaining as one of his Emmy-winning teleplays. Alda is inordinately attune recalling life's crystallizing moments: when religion no longer worked for him, how something in his pocket made him forever a better actor, or his mother's painful descent into dementia. Alda's ever present humor is a great asset whether telling a charming love story on meeting his wife Arlene or a life-threatening illness in a remote part of Chile ("I am in and out of consciences, but I never take a break from the screaming. The show must go on."). Like Alda's persona, his book is more human and less flash. What would be filler in most books is often the mot entertaining and revealing here; especially Alda's dynamic relationship with his parents. Really, who else would name his memoir after an unfortunate trip to the taxidermist? The year the book was published during a revival for the 69-year-old; he was nominated for an Oscar, Emmy, and Tony in the same year. --Doug Thomas

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Published January 1, 2005
ISBN 131729993
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Alan Alda
About the Author
Alan Alda
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Alan Alda is a writer and avid reader based in the Pacific Northwest. Before pursuing writing full-time, they spent over a decade working in education. When not working on their next book, Alan Alda can usually be found hiking with their dog or trying out new coffee shops in their neighborhood.

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Betty Johnson
Betty Johnson March 17, 2024
Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
Andrew Flores
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I was completely blown away. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. A true literary gem.
Gary Martinez
Gary Martinez September 04, 2025
I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
Edward Hill
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Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
Donald Mitchell
Donald Mitchell April 22, 2025
It was adequate. It verged on repetitive in the second act. A more concise edit would have served it well. A fair 3 stars.
Susan Phillips
Susan Phillips October 30, 2024
A decent, if standard, experience. It verged on repetitive in the second act. A more concise edit would have served it well. Perhaps more aligned with a different audience's tastes.
Patricia Harris
Patricia Harris August 09, 2025
I was completely blown away. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. A true literary gem.
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William Davis August 29, 2025
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Nancy King October 13, 2024
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I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
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Masterpiece from start to finish. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An effortless 5 stars.
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Masterpiece from start to finish. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
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Such a rich narrative. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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Masterpiece from start to finish. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
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Exceeded all my expectations. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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Masterpiece from start to finish. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An effortless 5 stars.
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Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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Emily Clark
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A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
Stephanie Torres
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A very strong entry. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. A solid 4 stars from me.
Donald Mitchell
Donald Mitchell April 26, 2024
A profoundly satisfying read. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An effortless 5 stars.
Michael Nelson
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A highly sophisticated read. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A very distinguished novel.
Margaret Hill
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A very strong entry. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A solid 4 stars from me.
Patricia Harris
Patricia Harris November 09, 2024
Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. A true literary gem.
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I find myself somewhat conflicted. The tempo was somewhat languid, and I found my mind wandering. Not poor, simply average. Suitable if your reading queue is empty.
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A highly sophisticated read. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. A very distinguished novel.
Elizabeth Rodriguez
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Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. Worth every moment spent reading.
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Patricia Harris March 12, 2025
Such a rich narrative. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. Worth every moment spent reading.
Donald Martinez
Donald Martinez December 06, 2024
I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
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A profoundly satisfying read. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. A true literary gem.
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It was adequate. It possessed moments of brilliance, but the narrative felt slightly disjointed ultimately. Perhaps more aligned with a different audience's tastes.
James Lee
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Absolutely brilliant. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. Worth every moment spent reading.
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Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. Worth every moment spent reading.
Lisa Gomez
Lisa Gomez January 07, 2025
Such a rich narrative. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An effortless 5 stars.
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Exceeded all my expectations. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. Worth every moment spent reading.
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A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
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Such a rich narrative. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
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A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
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Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
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A profoundly satisfying read. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. A true literary gem.
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I was completely blown away. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An effortless 5 stars.
Matthew Hernandez
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Masterpiece from start to finish. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
James Cruz
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Edward Wright
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Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
Donna Phillips
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A decent, if standard, experience. It possessed moments of brilliance, but the narrative felt slightly disjointed ultimately. Unlikely to reread, but a reasonable expenditure of time.
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Excellent, though slightly flawed. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. Quite impressive overall.
Anthony Flores
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A very strong entry. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A solid 4 stars from me.
Daniel Walker
Daniel Walker January 28, 2024
A profoundly satisfying read. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. A true literary gem.
Brian Martinez
Brian Martinez March 19, 2025
A profoundly satisfying read. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. I am now a lifelong fan of this author.
Jacob Thomas
Jacob Thomas January 19, 2024
A highly sophisticated read. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A very distinguished novel.
Rebecca Walker
Rebecca Walker January 04, 2024
Exceeded all my expectations. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. A true literary gem.
Stephanie Torres
Stephanie Torres October 17, 2025
A highly sophisticated read. The protagonist was compelling, though some subplots felt slightly overshadowed. Quite impressive overall.
George Jones
George Jones October 02, 2024
Such a rich narrative. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. A true literary gem.
Joseph Baker
Joseph Baker December 21, 2024
I was completely blown away. I became deeply invested in the protagonist's journey. A masterclass in storytelling. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
Lisa Reyes
Lisa Reyes September 24, 2025
Absolutely brilliant. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. Worth every moment spent reading.
Linda Rodriguez
Linda Rodriguez June 28, 2024
A decent, if standard, experience. It possessed moments of brilliance, but the narrative felt slightly disjointed ultimately. Suitable if your reading queue is empty.
Linda Nelson
Linda Nelson August 31, 2025
Absolutely brilliant. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
Stephanie Nelson
Stephanie Nelson May 04, 2025
Exceeded all my expectations. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. Worth every moment spent reading.
David Hill
David Hill March 22, 2024
A very strong entry. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A solid 4 stars from me.
Michelle  Davis
Michelle Davis January 29, 2024
I find myself somewhat conflicted. It possessed moments of brilliance, but the narrative felt slightly disjointed ultimately. A fair 3 stars.
Daniel Diaz
Daniel Diaz October 11, 2025
I find myself somewhat conflicted. The tempo was somewhat languid, and I found my mind wandering. Not poor, simply average. Unlikely to reread, but a reasonable expenditure of time.
Amanda Clark
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Exceeded all my expectations. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. An effortless 5 stars.
Margaret Hill
Margaret Hill December 11, 2024
I find myself somewhat conflicted. The tempo was somewhat languid, and I found my mind wandering. Not poor, simply average. Perfectly average.
Anthony Jackson
Anthony Jackson April 17, 2025
Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. Quite impressive overall.
Andrew Smith
Andrew Smith December 03, 2025
Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
John Robinson
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I thoroughly enjoyed the elegance of it. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
Stephanie Torres
Stephanie Torres June 27, 2025
A very strong entry. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A very distinguished novel.
Kenneth Miller
Kenneth Miller June 12, 2025
Masterpiece from start to finish. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
Sharon Edwards
Sharon Edwards March 16, 2025
Such a rich narrative. The pacing was impeccable and the characters felt incredibly authentic. I was completely immersed. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
Carol Evans
Carol Evans November 19, 2025
Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. It held my rapt attention, even when certain twists were telegraphed. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
Betty Miller
Betty Miller February 18, 2025
Masterpiece from start to finish. The prose is exquisite. It’s accessible yet undeniably sophisticated. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
Brian Hall
Brian Hall May 12, 2025
A highly sophisticated read. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. Quite impressive overall.
Matthew Hernandez
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Such a rich narrative. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An effortless 5 stars.
Steven Hill
Steven Hill December 04, 2025
A highly sophisticated read. The middle had a deliberate pace, but the climax was phenomenal. A solid 4 stars from me.
Joseph Phillips
Joseph Phillips November 05, 2024
Took a moment to build, but the payoff was spectacular. A brilliant concept executed with flair. Just a few pacing choices I would change. A wonderful companion for a quiet weekend.
Margaret Hill
Margaret Hill December 06, 2025
Honestly one of the most premium reading experiences lately. The author orchestrated a breathtaking finale. Truly a work of art. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
Edward Edwards
Edward Edwards August 22, 2024
It was adequate. Certain acts were fascinating, while others felt like a slight endeavor to complete. A fair 3 stars.
Mark White
Mark White December 24, 2025
A decent, if standard, experience. Certain acts were fascinating, while others felt like a slight endeavor to complete. A fair 3 stars.
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Donna Jackson February 16, 2024
Such a rich narrative. It strikes a perfect harmony of dialogue and world-building. Every chapter felt necessary. I will undoubtedly revisit this masterpiece.
James Adams
James Adams December 12, 2024
A very strong entry. Beautiful writing, though I craved slightly more depth in the lore. Still, undeniably engaging. I would highly recommend this to discerning readers.
Donald Thompson
Donald Thompson May 03, 2025
Such a rich narrative. I adored how the story unfolded. It kept me captivated without sacrificing elegance. An absolute must-read for connoisseurs of the genre.
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